I went on a date last night with someone I had been talking to for a couple of days. I honestly needed a distraction from missing the Beau. Conversation flowed easily and at a relaxed pace (bonus points: 1). He lives an hour away from me and had no problem driving to my town to meet me (bonus points: 1) When we sat down at our table, I realized how thin this man is. His cheeks were sunken in, his legs (through jeans) were thin, he had no rear end, and his arms were thin as well. He appeared to be thinner than my ex and that’s scary (bonus points: -2). Ever since I have left my ex, I have chosen men that have some meat on them. I didn’t want to date anyone that had his build ever again.
After some conversation, he shared with me that he had periodontal disease and all of his teeth were pulled and he wears dentures. There was a lengthy period of time in which he was only able to consume soups and said he lost about 70 pounds. That loss takes him from the appropriately sized (for his height) man to this waif.
I didn’t feel an attraction for this man physically and that’s hard to know if it’s because of timing or because I have sealed the door shut around my heart. Maybe both.
We talked at that relaxed pace for two hours. Upon leaving the restaurant, we chatted a bit more at his vehicle. It felt a bit awkward but probably again because of timing. I am still recovering from losing the Beau. I may be in denial.
I called it a night and we hugged…no kisses. Timing? Maybe. Kissing a waif? Probably. I can’t picture what he would look like without clothes. Like someone from a concentration camp? I can’t imagine cuddling that small frame. There’s no meat to rest my head on (bonus points: -2).
He’s a really nice guy, he’s 5 years older than me (he looks 10 years older), he has a great job, his own house, and he’s handsome. His eyes make me think of a big cuddly bear. I can see love and caring in those eyes (bonus points: 6).
I was told I keep choosing the wrong guys so when I am looking for distractions, I am swiping right on some that I wouldn’t typically choose. That’s where this man falls in. So what do I do? Should I keep seeing him and allow time to wash away the Beau? Can I move past the waif?
At this time it is too early to tell. I will still swipe left or right and have meaningless conversations with men that I probably won’t meet in person. As time moves on, I will recover (yet again) and continue moving forward. When I get back to my good place, perhaps Prince Charming will enter my life.
Until then, I wait.
Bonus points: 4.